With their short plaid skirts and white collared shirts and the inviting exposure between where the skirt cut off and the sock began, generating an erotic glare of exposed flesh.
In their uniforms the Catholic school girls felt like a superior breed, they were of higher stock and quality. I think we needed to see them that way, that if they represented cleanness and purity to our degeneracy and vileness, that meant they could serve as powerful forces, magical and otherwordly, beyond or above the shit of our neighborhood, and restore us to the greater parts of ourselves, the higher parts. They could restore us to us.
In this respect they were indispensable.
At the same time, on some level, we hated them for exactly the same reasons.
We needed to tear them down, make them pay for indiscretions they had never committed, trespasses they had never enacted. They could purify us, they could damn us.
On a most fundamental level, we were scared of them, or perhaps scared of how much we needed them.
I dumped all my G.I. Joes out of the shopping bag and onto the pavement of the driveway. I separated the good guys from the bad guys, and then arranged them in specific positions. Before initiating a battle, or an “episode,” as I called them, I would survey the figures, making sure that all weapons were in place, no good guys were mixed with bad guys, no one was missing.
As I inspected my tableaux, a shadow came over my miniature world.
I looked up.
It was Anya.
Her hair was in pigtails and she was eating a bright red icicle. A red stain was ringed around her mouth. Continue reading →