Whispers


Whisper, I want to be inside you, to your lover, when she is in the middle of a parent-teacher conference. Whisper, between your thighs I found blue lightning, to your lover, when she is driving in congested traffic on the highway. Whisper, your neck is my favorite unoccupied territory, to your lover, when she is doing taxes, or something else numerical and benumbing. Whisper countless unimaginable things to your lover on a daily basis. As an auxiliary component to this ritual, scream everything you whispered to your lover into a glass jar which you label Fruit Salad.

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Ghost Story

Understand clearly that you are a ghost haunting your own life. Do not seek an exorcist, nor a mirror. Do not try and revise or cure your condition. Put on a white sheet, cut two slits for eyeholes, and wander from room to room in your house, taking time in each room. At some point, find a mirror and stare into it, understanding clearly that beneath the sheet is nobody. Ask a friend you trust to come over and play-act the role of an exorcist, and have them fill a water gun with tap water and squirt you numerous times, while reciting made-up verses from Ecclesiastes. Remind yourself that there is no difference between a Methodist and a Jew, a rottweiler and a goldfish, an umbrella and a water fountain. Continue listing not differences and when you are satisfied with your catalog, remove the sheet and look into the mirror. As promised, you are not there. Smile. As if someone who cares is snapping your photo.

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Telegram

Send a telegram from a future perspective to someone who resembles you in present time. In the telegram, tell the person resembling you who and what you would like to become. Assure them that this is not blackmail or psychic extortion, and that you hold no actual leverage over their present decision(s). Also, remind them that mergers, in real-time, take a long spell to happen immediately.

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Alignment

Conceive of your body as the size of a planet. Notice that your body is inhabited by many things, each unique and unrepeatable in its design and imprint. Shrink yourself down to the size of an amoeba. Observe the uniquely unrepeatable structures of the giants roaming the world of which you are a part. Conceive of yourself as a human being. What do you see?

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Before Beauty

Count the number of wrinkles in the night sky. Count the number of wrinkles in the ocean. Tell the sky it is old and beautiful. Tell the ocean it is old and beautiful. Write a note saying—I am old and beautiful—and tape it onto a mirror. Look into the mirror and recite the words aloud—I am old and beautiful. This can be done no matter what age you imagine yourself to be, no matter the length and breadth and volume of your memory.

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Directory

Pick a name at random from a phone book. Let’s say Shultz. Pick a second name at random from a phone book. Let’s say Espinoza. Call Schultz and pretend to be Espinoza. Call Espinoza and pretend to be Schultz. Then call a third stranger, let’s say Mills, and pretend to be yourself.  

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Sleep Study

Sleep. For days and nights sleep, days and weeks, sleep. Forget your children. Forget your husband. Forget your pets. Forget the state of your furniture. Forget the state you’re living in. Forget the bills that have to be paid. Forget the last time you had an orgasm, real or false. Forget all unspecified anxieties gnawing at your entrails. Forget, and sleep as if you are waiting to be born. Wake up and know that you are already dead. Go on dreaming.

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Mooning

Go outside with a hand mirror on a full moon night. Breathe into the mirror. Then hold the mirror up to the moon at such an angle that moonlight is reflected into the palm of your free hand. Go to someone you love, someone with whom you share intimate touch. Undress the person slowly, until there is nothing left but light. Use your moon-soaked hand to touch them all over. Continue doing this, light on light, until one or both of you gasps immeasurably.

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Touch

Bleed a sunset until your hands are dyed maraschino, until your palms are scorched. Then go to bed with someone you love. Undress them slowly. When you reach the unoccupied territory of bare skin, allow your hands to caress unremittingly. Ask the person what it feels like to have the sun touching them with explicit favor.

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Judy Garland

Tell yourself Christmas is a Technicolor fantasy celebrated on the moon. Bring young Judy Garland to mind. Have her sing Christmas is a Technicolor fantasy celebrated on the moon, the lyrics improvisationally transmitted from your mind to her lips. While Judy sings, her voice at times quavering like crystal intimating its own valor and demise, recall someone dead you loved. Unwrap the memory, as if a gift.

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