Curriculum Vitae

Born: Waiting (Still)

Dead: Today (Always)

At Present: Redeemable

Interpersonal Skills: Works in Progress

Education: Breathing

Objective: Not Applicable

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©

Copyright every thought you imagine you have. Attach yourself to it, to them. Construct an identity around these collected thoughts, and copyright the identity. If you find one of your thoughts being spoken or shared by someone else, inform the user that the thought they believe to be theirs, actually belongs to you, and you have the copyright to prove it. If you encounter someone in public who resembles you in a manner that qualifies as copyright infringement, remind the person that identity theft is a violation punishable by law. If you happen to be accused of copyright infringement, for living someone else’s life, speaking someone else’s words, or appropriating their persona, redraw the imaginary lines between you and the rest of the world.

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Cats

Spend New Year’s eve at home, alone, with a cat. At precisely midnight, ask the cat the meaning of life. Whatever the cat responds, mark it down in a notebook. The following New Year’s eve, repeat the procedure with a different cat. See if the answers match.

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Encore

Kill someone in your mind. Bring them back to life. Throw a party to celebrate their resurrection. Do the same thing again, replacing someone with you, and mind with dream.

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Eulogy

Drop dead several times each day and recite advance eulogies for the persons so explicitly shed. Allow grief to function not as barrier or backwater but rather a marker for diminishing returns.

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Trip Hop

Issue 2 of Dilate magazine has dropped, popped and rolled. An elixir of stimulating brew initiating the new-new. My piece “Trip Hop” is in the mindfizzy mix.

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Apocalyptic Bop

Happy to be a creative contributor to the resurrected and phoenix rising incarnation of Dilate magazine. Issue 2 just dropped for the new year.

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Merger

Spend one day as the person you always imagined you’d be. If it suits you, do it for a second day. Then a third. Continue impersonating your dream-self until you grow tired and decide to call it quits, or filial merger occurs in real time.

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Sync Hole

Imagine the person standing next to you is thinking about you. If there is no one standing next to you imagine a person standing next to thinking about you. What are they thinking? Imagine yourself thinking about a person thinking thoughts about someone standing next to you thinking thoughts about you. Replace you with them. Now think thoughts about you as them and vice-versa. Do the thoughts match? Imagine there is no one left in the world expect you, yet you remain plagued by thoughts of someone thinking thoughts about you, someone you can’t see or hear, someone who cannot possibly exist, since you have been assured that you are the only person left in the world. What kind of world is this? Imagine an inconceivable world where no one spends any time thinking about you, because everyone is thinking about themselves, which removes you as a source of identification and disquiet from the equation. Why are you still feeling troubled and bewitched? Imagine water flowing. Keep imagining this until you are cured.

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Slapstick

Walk down the street, any and every street, tripping in different ways. In different cities, in different states, practice the art of falling and getting back up. Some people will claim that the getting back up is the most important part, but really, the falling, the how and now of the falling, is where the art is developed. In time you may reach what is called slapstick enlightenment, where falling up stairs or into the sky becomes the graceful norm.

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