Love is Real, the Remix

I thought I knew
a lot,
explanations
analyses
profound conjectures
nothing new under the sun
stupid is as stupid does
tomorrow tomorrow tomorrow
marathon swims
in the think tank
and abstractions
wrapped like leaden scarves
and flags round my neck
and shoulders,
I thought knowing
would keep me safe
and soundproofed
in a vault of my own making,
and in many respects
it did
and does,
so I cannot sit here
up in arms
and villify
the architectural savvy
of a relentless mind
bent on survival
while working for an escape artist,
but what I can do is stack a series of concepts
against a single image,
profound in its simplicity:
a small child
reaching out for her mother’s hand
and holding on tightly
as they cross the street
and when they get to to the other side
the child looks up into her mother’s eyes
and pours, lidlessly,
deepwelling wordless love
and cherishment.
I thought I knew
so much
but I often overlooked
or missed
Love,
in no need
of theories
concepts
or codes,
its simplicity
the holiest of
known forces.
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Torch Song

Nature
does not express
opinions,
she
asserts herself
with whatever force
is necessary
to explode
the billion screaming hearts
tendered from her wellsprung artistry.
Nature
does not engage in philosophy
or debates,
she, unbridled, the husbandless pagan,
teems and throbs
and pulses
and sculpts
and shapes
according to ingrown design,
symmetry
wedded
to Mystery’s
magma-infused bones.
Nature
does not catalog
or subscribe,
her order is of the infinite variety,
the fathomless bask
refraining multitudes,
method to the madness
of her recursive cast
and die,
the consummate artist,
inhabiting every form and style,
supplying an endless bounty
and siege of mastepieces,
to cherish, in the way
a  wrinkly newborn stares burning
ancient pink into its mother’s eyes
for the first time,
the phenomena of torch
passed
and duly revived.
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Blossoms

There is no secret,
no magic this
or that, or know-how manual
to guide the process
to betterment,
it is, I believe,
simply a matter of paying attention,
to people, flowers, sand, stones,
dolls, puddles, dreams,
souls,
first and foremost your own,
its calling
nothing short of love
wanting to know itself
heard and fulfilled,
I have found
that attention charitably paid
reaps the greatest dividends,
entire worlds, hidden, unseen,
green and warm and blossom,
a swelling, lidless
in its capacity to grow.
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I See Myself

I always saw the humanity
behind his thick-lidded eyes, the small child,
begging for a banquet of golden crumbs
to appease the motherache churning
in his heart and stomach.
A thousand lions
pitted against a studded
chainsmoking beergutted gladiator,
I saw that too,
he, the lions, the gladiator,
the arena,
the smoke and booze,
all of it,
held hard in a concentrated siege,
a flash-flood and toxic smolder, and at his feet,
I cowered, and proceeded to bury myself.
He was my father,
still is.
The bond between us thick
as viscous chains,
the sort that perpetrate magma,
and rattle and clank
when carried by the blue shivery breath
of ghosts
down long hallways
branching out
into labyrinths
where every last bruised nothing
meets to forge bonds.
We are there, partly,
he and I, father and son,
but also, I am here,
a rampant indwelling,
a man who learned to take a saw
to chains,
warbling
heavy metal into blues,
a nightingale, moonthroated, with laryngitis,
yes, it is never too soon
or late to sing,
and I, in my mortal remains,
exist as living proof,
I am here, mostly,
a boy, a man,
the ghosts
no longer my enemies,
nor the bared teeth of an infant haunt,
but rather my teachers, my guides,
and when I look into his eyes,
I see staggered humanity, a small child,
a human doing the best he can,
I see myself, expanding
beyond the myth of lions
and gladiators,
I see myself,
rapt and sealed,
signing my name
to soul,
and blessed to know
Beauty’s lasting friendship.

 

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I Listen

Dawn. The sea breeze,
salt-fringed, rolls in through
the opened glass doors,
its damp fingers sifting
and touching upon
the cravings,
rent and folds
of our shared bare skin,
It’s like home, you say,
and this makes me dig my nails
in deeper,
like a feral cat, just learning
how to regulate and express its affection
through its claws,
Like a poem, is what you say next,
and I lay my head on your chest
and stay there
no longer the boy I was
the one who used to be terrified
of hearts,
ones belonging to others,
my own,
something about the beating
freaked me out, i.e.,
when I’d place my hand
over my own heart
I couldn’t bear it
it felt too powerful
too real
too something
and I’d quickly withdraw
to spare myself both the effect
and its cause.
I am not that boy anymore.
I let my head stay on your chest,
your breathing a lullaby-raft
upon which I feel safe and secure,
held, and soothed to no end,
I allow my ear to openly receive
the music of your heart, its rabbit-beatings,
I listen, when you tell me
this is all there is,
I listen, when you giggle
at my off-color remarks
involving salt, dust, bones,
honey, and you,
I listen,
when you laugh
at my riff on junkie clowns
staring down nostalgic maraschino sunsets,
and when I ask you
to tell me something good,
something sweet,
and you speak my name, three times, softly,
I listen,
then watch
as you begin to cry,
from open wounds,
soundlessly.

 

 

 

 

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Set Course

The love I don’t get
to live with her,
I am going to have to live
and attend, sublimely, through fiction,
there are only so many lives
to choose from,
to assume gracefully,
so many courses
upon which the sun rises
and sets.
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Requite

Real lovers,
brave ones,
requite
to the nth degree,
nestled snugly
in a hollow
shaped to fit their bodies,
they
assume joint custody
of Beauty
as they fully twine
and engage.
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Kin

There are chambers
inside myself
I have yet to discover
or visit,
for example,
that one room
rumored
to contain
a monk
in tattered robes
hunched over
a yellow table
benignly autistic
in his relations to text
and verses
which have held him
happily captive
for many lifetimes,
that monk,
a lighted fool
and legend
near to my heart
in all its lucid intimations
and engendered kin.

 

 

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Gloam

Fretted,
to beckon
gloam,
and slant felt shadows,
I cannot hold
what was never
mine to grasp.
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Mercury

I have never been
a fan
of strength in numbers,
but rather,
love,
counted upon
to split edges,
to chasten
the drift
and siege
of molten core.

 

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