The Haunting of One’s Self

auster
Review of Paul Auster’s 4 3 2 1, appearing in Riot Material.
“He believed in an infinite series of times, in a growing, dizzying net of divergent, convergent and parallel times. This network of times which approached one another, forked, broke off, or were unaware of one another for centuries, embraces all of possibilities of time.” — Jorge Luis Borges, “The Garden of Forking Paths”
One could imagine Borges, who declared that the basic devices of fantastic literature are four-fold—the work within the work, the contamination of reality by dream, the voyage in time, and the double—as personal timekeeper and Virgil-visioned guide to Paul Auster, who for the past half a century has trafficked in existential loops and slipknots, identity crises and vanishing acts. Auster, whether writing fiction or non-fiction, writing in the first person or third person, has always haunted his own writings, sort of as the negative imprint of a splitting point.You could argue that his canon as a whole, comprises a jigsaw autobiography of shadows and illusions, obliquely referring back to its source: an author by the name of Paul Auster who doesn’t exist ( the “I-is-somebody-else” of Rimbaud.) This is his metaphysical stock-in-trade, and in 4 3 2 1, his first novel in seven years, Auster strives to capture it in his most epic manner to date.”
Read the full review here.
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Obscene not Herded

Destiny,
the morningstar,
hikes her dress up high
and pisses a saberlike stream
of light,
honeyed pixels
outsourcing guidance.
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Naming Desire

Whoever I am,
I have always depended
on the kindness of words—
such strange company
these solitary verses.
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Bedsores

In the permanent flophouse
Love reigns supreme—
A tried and torn migrant
ready to drop
from chronic fatigue
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i for an I

Dear Letters of the Alphabet,
We regret to inform you
of the untimely death
of one of your brethren, lowercase i.
Gone missing a while back,
we were hoping for its return
to its rightful place in the alphabet,
but alas,
it could not survive the I-me-mine
culture’s fixation
and dependency upon
uppercase I, a.k.a., the big I.
It has gotten so bad
that whenever it is about U,
it somehow becomes a matter of I,
and if it’ s about ME,
it is still about I,
leaving the poor M and E
feeling flat and not needed.
That being said,
society’s unhealthy obsession
with the Big I
has left us no choice
but to force this vowel
to stand trial.
Whether or not
the Big I is to blame
for its role in the I-centric
attitude and lexicon
of modern society,
I cannot say.
What I can state, unequivocally:
the Big I has grown more and more inflated,
monstrously obscene,
 if you’ll indulge
me a dash of hyperbole,
and as a consequence of this
bloated inflation,
the Big I has suffered a great loss
in both value and meaning.
And so, Letters of the Alphabet,
I’ll conclude my text
by beseeching each and every one
of you to be present at the trial
–remember every letter counts
and holds equal value—
and to please keep alive
the memory of little I,
and let its passing
serve as a grave reminder:
when the last letter falls,
there can be no more
US.
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How-To Manual

Hands reach, instinctively,
because they understand
what the mind’s fixed gears
are sometimes too tight
or slow to grasp:
the necessity of
shrinking distance
through first contact,
the dream-life of prayers.
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Film Treatment

God in the small details,
the Devil in the abstract—
in between, Us, the stuff
stars are made from,
on the cutting room floor.
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The Urban Way

Boy on street corner
brown bag in his hand, crinkling–
Yo, I’ve gotta piss.
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The Little Emperor

little emperor

(In memory of Anthony Hassett, and in response to his artwork)
I have seen
the Little Emperor—
mischievous, unabashed, baiting
in borrowed skin
dong tolling through the marketplace
offering his services for a nominal fee.
He leads, without words,
through smile and eyes alone
flesh blood bone advertisement
robed in dust baked brown
in the sun’s unremitting violence
hands nursing thin air
into something mesmeric.
One afternoon I ask him—May I take your picture,
to which he responds by flashing an upturned palm.
As soon as he is paid he strikes a pose,
voguing Marilyn or Madonna,
snap, and then again, snap—
the Little Emperor clearly relishing
the instant celebrity aroused by my camera.
It is only later,
in my room, alone,
images of the Little Emperor
spread upon the table—
that I come to understand
the true meaning of double exposure.
It begins with an Exacto,
and just the right amount of human interest.
A single blade
held up to the light
gently excising
surface claims and
false derivatives.
Bit
        by bit
                    by bit
prosthetic names and dead skin fall away
until I am left gaping into the source of majesty, revealed.
Emboldened,
I run through the marketplace, screaming:
I have seen the Little Emperor naked
I have seen him naked for real—
Yet no one turns to look,
I think because I left my skin
at home, and bluntly lucid
is an advertisement with
too much glare
and not enough hook.

 

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Winnie Cooper #9

After all these years I still might use the same technique:
tugging on pigtails.
A cruel and delightful swing, gaining momentum to vault
headfirst into your secret hive,
vaguely aware of and interested in honey,
but the main draw, your bees,
and how many stings I could endure.
I was a littleboy then, ripe
with viciousness and feelings that came over me
which I didn’t understand.
And you?
Do you still have pigtails?
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