In autumn’s brisk grief,
leaves flashing briefest raptures
to seed elegies.
In autumn’s brisk grief,
leaves flashing briefest raptures
to seed elegies.
Near to the bone
warming and wildly grazing
in solitude not lonely
but rather alone in the company
of words stories voices
enabling vagrancy
within most cherished intimacies
rooting me home.
Near to the bone
wildly grazing
in solitude not lonely
but rather alone in the company
of words stories voices
enabling my vagrancy
in rooting me home.
Solitude warming
in the company of words–
Shorthand for spooning.
We’ve heard rumors that God doesn’t know he exists. She exists. It. Whatever the gender or genderless you get the picture. God doesn’t know there is such thing as God that he is this thing we call God this blessed hunk of bright rock candy savored by longing mouths. No one told him. She doesn’t know. Someone we don’t know who someone suggested that it is our duty our sacred task to remind her Hey God you are God you are this explicit thing we call God who gives us this day and all days our daily core our be all end all edness. How to make God understand she is there an impact with no strings attached. God might receive us and say There is no God or God who exactly when she finds herself confronted by a roving needy tribunal and this not done out of spite malice amnesia or anything of the sort but simply because rapture doesn’t call itself rapture its voice voices rapture doesn’t spell out r-a-p-t-u-r-e in claims nor does long deep sorrow go around infatuated with its past and riff upon itself as a phrase. We as selves conscious of ourselves become conscious of God as name God as yin God as yang God as yo-yo God as bright rock candy from a distant gift shop. Another lost one of us speculated that even if God was told who she was she wouldn’t hear you because God is All Ears and All Ears cannot hear themselves in a name repeated endlessly. All Ears is mirrorless in its tune ins its listening. If God wakes up to the glittering hard candy fact that she exists as this thing called God worlds would truly truly move away from themselves in ways unimaginable. At least this is what was suggested by one of us long since defected now trespassing freely whenever wherever.
You must remember this: the force of all things moving commingled with the ephemera of all things passing. This the spell the grail the gist of what I am after which is also after me. The stalker stalked while pursuing. Hooded in shadows tigers green fire eyes light up new seasons. Words born from holy seethe. From books of hours of longing. Tenderest shoots spiral forth as nuptials just because. Within just because the force of all things moving mating with the ephemera of all things passing endlessly renewed. In others words you must remember this: a kiss is still a kiss whether planted on the secret mouths of underground mistresses or upon your own mirrorless throb and cast.
Grief attends to the bones. And does so listening to the spaces between the hollows where the ghosts are held hissing where loss compounded by fractures gives rise to near distant voices crying out on behalf of all that’s gone missing. It is matter of tempo of pacing. We do our best to sync up with what has left us what is behind rising again. In this respect the cadence of seances is our lead. We hum we sway. Possessed by the need to move we ask whatever ghost comes our way if we could have this dance. We are incorrigible romantics with a fondness for death warmly pressed against us echoing.
Grief attends to the bones. And does so listening to the spaces between the hollows where the ghosts are held hissing where loss compounded by fractures gives rise to near distant voices crying out on behalf of all that’s gone missing.
Out here we fast on slimming heaps of gratitude. None of us are greedy. Everyone gets their helpings. We chow down on gratitude and then pass it along making sure everyone gets their fill. Gratitude has become our beef stock our bone broth our nourishment. We feed then pass it on. The passing on is the thing. It is the right passage the lighted one. We have experienced countless wrong passages that left us hands high in the air cursing at clouds or weeping into scarred palms wondering about passageways wandered and why always wrong. But no more. We fast on slimming heaps of gratitude and no one moans no one bitches. Complaining no longer part of our vernacular. It has been eradicated. Abolished. A new day dawning has dawned for us and is perpetually dawning. The loop we are caught in is caught in us. Acceptance of all the key to one.
If music be the proof of love then play on. Someone said this once. We heard it in the volumes of echoes. There’s a lot we have heard from the volumes of echoes but you cannot discern the sources of voices. No citations only anonymities. Voices voicing with no bones holding distinction. Distinctions references footnotes all that left long ago. But to go back to what we heard said If music be the proof of love then play on. We decided that was us from what we were made. The gist of our essence raveled in this core phrase echoing from wherever. We have become a hymnal species kissing our mirrorless want on the lips.
We are out here on all fours panting in the sun the bleary merciless maraschino sun burning us. It has been a long while one of those spells that feels foreverish out here in these fields unseen dreaming of god knows what. We are permanently scarred. Some of us suggested we become a group that goes by the name Permanently Scarred maybe a band except none of us sing or play an instrument. I’d say we are disembodied voices except we are on all fours with the sun burning us so something like bodies something like skin must be our lot and inheritance. Knowing the void answerless you’d think we’d stop asking questions but we don’t What’s for dinner Where’s the moon Did we do something to deserve this. We ask answerless and listen hoping dreamless. You could call us a sorry bunch but then again not knowing whether finite or infinite there is nothing to assess no one to blame. There’s just us on all fours the sun burning unrelenting. If we decide to call ourselves Permanently Scarred maybe one of us will learn to sing so we can earn our name. It’s either that or absolute silence which none of us have yet tried.